We have Homer Simpson playing at our wedding...

Dad got an email from the ceilidh band which will be playing at our reception over the weekend. They were asking him to confirm that they'll be fed and watered during the evening, so he wrote back, telling them they would be able to have the hog roast with the guests, and that soft drinks, tea and coffee will be provided. The church centre isn't licensed so he told them what we're telling all the guests - you're welcome to bring your own alcohol, but we're not providing any for the evening.

They wrote back to say "no, we want beer and you have to provide it because it's in the contract".

Dad looked at the contract and it does say that the band should be provided with fruit juice or beer as requested. However he was a bit miffed because this means that the band is effectively asking for better treatment than the guests if they get alcohol supplied and everyone else has to bring their own.

He asked them why they wanted beer and was told "it's the same with all musicians". Dad restrained himself from writing back to tell them that there are three musicians in his imediate family (me, Mom and little brother), and we all manage to play fine without alcohol.

Actually I'm doing the band a disservice - apparently the drummer doesn't drink alcohol and will be happy with tap water. The rest will get beer as requested, but it will be beer that's been left over from various visits, not especially bought beer. Can't have the band having special treatment, and it's not like we're not paying them enough to cover a couple of cans of beer each...